So, it's getting closer and closer to the time when I'll be getting picked up and moved for a while so I can have this baby in the presence of family and (hopefully) my husband if he gets back in time! It's getting so real now as I go from day to day realizing the changes and stress pregnancy has on your body.
I have an insatiable appetite for chocolate and cereal...neither of which fill me up or help my weight!
I have a (what I feel like is a) HUGE belly and I can see the stretch marks I had from my first pregnancy and I'm just hoping I don't end up with a bunch more. I'd like to still be able to wear a bikini after this! So far I'm confident that if they stay as they are I should be good...but who knows. Sometimes I feel as if there's no where she could possibly go if she gets any bigger, which she obviously will. It really is amazing the changes a woman's body goes through to have a baby. Not only do I feel stretched to max capacity, rolling over in bed is a joy since it's as if I can't breathe when I go from one side to the other...not to mention I have to shift the pillow that supports my leg and keeps my hips from killing me. Then there's the moment when you step on the scale and think...do I really weigh that much?? Luckily, I think I'm doing better this time than with my first pregnancy. And there's the fun hiccups she has that I get to experience multiple times a day (which is fun at first, but then gets a big annoying when it's often during the time you're trying to fall asleep). My son had them too and just like him, she's making sure I know she's there just before I drift off to sleep.
However, throughout it all, many women decide to go through this process more than once in their lifetime. There are a lot of things to complain about (and I don't even have swollen ankles or hands or many of the other unpleasant pregnancy "symptoms"), but all and all it's an amazing experience. The pain of birth aside, I wish everyone could go though this and know what it's like to carry your child and feel the bond that you do with your child when it's born. Having children is something I didn't know if I wanted to do until just 3 years ago. I was happy with my freedom, my job, my sleep, my life, but something told me it was time to consider it and after talking it over with my husband we both decided it was time to move on from dogs to babies. While I do miss my previous life, I'd never go back knowing what amazing gift being a parent can be. I enjoy every day with my son and despite his father being away for awhile, he keeps me happy and helps with the loneliness of the deployment. I have found it harder to keep up while being pregnant chasing a toddler. I know that chasing a toddler around instead of the desk job I had when I was pregnant with said toddler is a lot more challenging, but some days I have to remind myself I can do this and keep chugging along.
Deployments are no fun and I think sometimes they give you a chance to reflect on your life and your marriage. Some people are torn apart, some are brought together. During my first deployment it was rough and I hated the first few months. Loneliness was everyday and phone calls were only once a week if that (while my friends all had skype to talk to their hubbies). This time things are different. I'm sure the loneliness will hit me worst when I'm back home on my own with two children and no help, but I suppose I will have to look at this as a challenge. I have been strong on many fronts before and this is just a test of my strength. Although, to be honest, the real test of strength will be the day this baby arrives and the strength both emotionally, physically, and mentally I'll need should my husband not be there for the big moment. And while I will become a mother yet again, I have to say there is no greater time when you want your mother and thankfully this time I will have her there to support me regardless of my husbands presence. I think strength is the one thing that sets the success from the failure. I aim to be strong and make the most out of what may be a hard situation.
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